I'm a country~Adult! Sealand X Reader

(a request for yeah some swearing.)

You are sitting in the world meeting when some fine piece of man walks in the room. You don't think you have seen him around before. And you had been a country for quite a while now.

"Hot damn. I'd tap that ass."
"(Y/N) WHAT THE HELL?." The fine piece of ass says.
"Wait how the fuck do you know my name? I don't think I have talked to any hotties before."
"It's me. Sealand."
"WHAT THE FUCK. I TAKE BACK EVERYTHING I SAID. OH MY GOD CAN I BARF NOW. I FEEL LIKE I AM ON ONE OF THOSE SHOWS LIKE PUNKED. WAIT WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU." You feel sick to your fucking stomach. Sealand is one of the most annoying people you have met and that says a lot since you know the bad touch trio.

"Well its this thing called the birds and the bees........"
"Wait are you saying you got laid." You say horrified. How the fuck did Sealand get laid before you.
"NO. I MEANT PUBERTY."
"OH. I knew that."
"Sure." He rolls his eyes.


"Wait why the fuck are you in a world meeting? You ain't a country."
"Yeah I am."
"Last time I check. You were this little man made thing in the ocean with only a few people living there."
"Yeah so.....I am still a bloody country."
"Get out. The world meeting is for countries. Not little brats."
"Well before you knew it was me you thought I was 'a fine piece of ass' a second ago."
"That was in the past. Let it go." (author-chan starts singing let it go in the distance.)
"Sure." He says sarcastically.

Before you can say anything else to insult him, a pair of lips crashes into yours. To your disbelieve it was Sealand kissing you. Never did you ever think that would happen but here you are kissing him back.

"Hey (y/n) Who is the fine piece of ass you are making out with." England says.
You and Sealand stop kissing.
"Well bloody asshole, It is me. Sealand."
"EW FUCK. I FEEL LIKE I AM ON ONE OF THOSE PRANK SHOWS. EW I AM GOING TO BLOODY BARF MY GUTS OUT. OH MY SCONES. WHERE IS FLYING MINT BUNNY WHEN I NEED HIM." And with that England passes out on the floor.